One of my oldest and best friends has two demeanors. "Summer Grace" is happy and relaxed and can do anything i.e. be the next Martha Stewart of photography, home decorating, real estate, entrepreneurship, and world missions. "Fall Grace" is busy, stressed, often ill, and generally driven insane by close to 30 elementary school kids.

DJ also has two: "Oral Surgeon DJ" and "Infectious Diseases DJ." "Oral Surgeon DJ" leaves the house before sunrise, is on call multiple times a week, and is generally tired and stressed and in no mood to deal with a needy, lonely wife. This month, "Infectious Diseases DJ" has decided to make an appearance, resulting in gourmet meals cooked for me (Pauline) and the observance of two actual holidays!!

To pay tribute to "Infectious Diseases DJ", I thought I'd show you what random and sometimes gross things can be found sitting on your kitchen counter when you're married to someone who works with teeth.


This will bring back fond memories for Joycie, who shamelessly ignores her oral surgeon's warnings.


He uses this when I don't feel like letting him practice on me.


...and this is the evil thing that finds itself in my mouth and causes me to receive lectures about not having seen a dentist in 8 years despite dating/being married to one for five of those.