I went to a dentist today, for the first time in seven years. The dentist asked why it's been so long, and before answering, I ran through a list of possible responses in my head:

"Well, my husband graduated from dental school and now he's an oral surgeon."

or

"When DJ was in dental school, I thought he would clean my teeth. But that never happened. Oh well."

or

"I thought people who are married to dentists automatically have clean teeth. And I floss everyday."

or

"With all due respect, I hate seeing dentists."

or finally,

"Well, the thing is, I'm about to quit my job and lose my dental insurance so I thought I'd squeeze in at least one cleaning during this decade."